Emotions Run High

From what I read, it appeared as if pregnancy would do a number on my emotions. And, indeed, there were a handful of times my emotions overcame me during those nearly-forgotten 9 months; but nothing prepared me for the emotions I would feel closing a business. Many books exist on how to open a business, I have yet to find one that discusses how to close one. And how to deal with the emotions of closing a business - well, you might as well not have emotions because I don't really think anyone wants to talk about them.

I've asked a family friend/counselor for a good recommendation for a grief counselor. Grief is what you go through when you close a business. Grief is rarely discussed - at the death of a loved one nor the death of a business. And yet, grief is a natural emotion, a Biblical process, and a human experience. I wrote an article once for a women's magazine about the process of grief after I went through a relationship break-up. Of course, that was 17 computers ago and so I am not sure where that advice is now, but boy, I'd love to re-visit that article and take some of my own advice!

The store was opened for the last day this past Saturday - March 28. I worked from the very start of the day, and was the last one to leave at night, after all the penny-pinching women had come to dig through our racks for the last time. It's like darts through the soul when women complain about the price of something when it's so far below what I paid for it!

The most common question right now is: What's Next?

It's typically followed by one of these statements...

Are you just gonna be a stay-at-home mom?
As if to imply "just" means you get to rest all day!

Will you open up another store somewhere else?
Since the economy is doing so well and we decided it was simply our location that caused our sales to drop 65%!

Is someone coming to buy your leftover clothes?
Because that's exactly what TJ Max does, right? Yeah, they spend all their time going to boutiques going-out-of-business for their goods.

What's your next venture going to be?
Implying I have enough money and energy to actually venture somewhere!

Granted, these are all natural and normal questions, but when someone's grieving, they aren't received very "naturally."

So, to answer the question, "what's next?" here goes: We don't really know. We have a lot, lot, lot more debt that assets presently and so now we begin the negotiation process of figuring out how to pay for a business we just closed, a business we never saw a dime from, and a business we will be paying for years after it is a far-away memory for our customers and employees.

But for now, it's all pretty raw. And so, this short, little "business widow" is going to have good days and bad days throughout her grieving process. She's going to focus on finishing these negotiations well. And until there's a firm answer on how much money is due and a plan of how to pay it back, she's gonna enjoy "just being a stay-at-home-mom!"

Comments

[Lucinda Perry]

Laurie....I just love you. I will be thinking of you and praying for you.

[Amber Yoars]

Laurie I know you will cherish your time with Carter more time than ever before. I can bet you haven't had this much time with him since he was born............enjoy:-)

[Jeremy Roe]

I'm so proud of you. I know you'll finish strong. Think about the lessons you can share with Carter one day in the future.

[Susan Powell]

Laurie, I feel the rawness you feel in your words. My heart goes out to you friend. These lessons are hard, but hopefully soon this experience will feel less like scars and more like healing (words from one of my favorite Sara Groves songs). My prayers and blessings are with you.

[B Thrower]

I have been thinking about you and want you to know that you have a lot of folks that care. "B"

[Diana]

Hey sweet Laurie. I'm so proud of you FOR grieving. Tim and I have thought about you and Jeremy so many times, and have prayed for you. We will continue. I can only imagine how hard it's been. We are trusting the Lord with on this new path. Love you...